Sue Dearman Celebrant
Professional Civil Celebrant in Suffolk and London
Scattering or Interment of Ashes
Honour the memory of your moved one and scatter or inter their ashes
with grace in a beautiful and meaningful farewell.
Plan your unique goodbye
There are lots of reasons for having a formal goodbye with your loved ones ashes. Perhaps they had a direct cremation, the funeral was private and understated, it went by in a blur or it took place during Covid. Here are some ideas for that final goodbye.
Why?
The funeral often takes place shortly after a loss, during a time when emotions are raw, and the shock of bereavement is still fresh - especially after an unexpected passing. What you need from a funeral in those early days may differ greatly from what you'd want from a memorial ceremony held later. Holding an ashes ceremony a few months after the funeral allows you the space to plan a more meaningful and uplifting tribute, focusing on celebrating and giving thanks for your loved one’s life. It can often provide another happy and healing memory of your loved one.



When?
If you're uncertain about where or when to scatter or inter the ashes, there’s no need to rush. You can take your time and hold onto them until you're ready to make that decision. If you have had the ashes a long time and you have not scattered or interred them, it may be because you can't face parting with the remains of your loved one. However, this may be a sign that you are not yet dealing with your grief. If so, do consider some grief counselling. Or, maybe keeping some of the ashes as a keepsake. Take a look at suggestions further down this page.
Where?
Families often choose a place of significance to them to scatter ashes, or choose to have them interred in their garden, church, or cemetery. Where you choose is pretty much up to you. Here are some examples:
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In a churchyard, cemetery or natural burial ground
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Over the sea, a river or body of water
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In a national park or public space
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On private land (back garden, sports ground or private farmland)
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But there are a few rules you will need to follow (see below).



How?
There is no reason why you have to use a celebrant for a scattering/interment. You can gather the people who matter most together and say a few words. However, this can be an emotional occasion and you may prefer to have someone who is used to performing ceremonies to help you. They can suggest ideas, provide material and say the words on the day. If you want the ashes to be scattered or interred as part of a memorial then a celebrant will definitely be able to take any stress of the day off your shoulders. The ceremony can be as short and as simple as you like, or a much larger and grander affair, which is often the case if the deceased had a direct cremation or a very private funeral. Cost depend on what you choose and small and simple is certainly cheaper than a full-blown funeral.

Things to know
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You need a landowner's permission to scatter ashes on their land.
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If you want to scatter them somewhere closed and special like a football ground, don't be afraid to ask, they may grant permission.
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You can scatter ashes in a river or in the sea, but you cannot add anything that may pollute the water. And obviously don't do it in such a way that it disturbs other people.
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Not all cemeteries allow scattering ashes, so check with the cemetery directly for their rules. If you own a plot of land in the cemetery, you should be able to scatter ashes over a family grave. Do check the rules.
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You can have ashes made into fireworks so that they can be scattered in that manner.
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Don't add ashes to plants or trees as the high pH and sodium content isn't necessarily good for all plants.



Can I keep some ashes?
Yes of course. There are companies who now make jewellery that contain a small amount of ashes. These can be made into a bracelet, pendant, ring or cufflinks to be carried with you always. You can also add ashes to paperweights, LPs or Christmas tree baubles in fact just about anything that can be made can have ashes added to it during the manufacturing process Or you may simply opt to keep the ashes in a wooden, willow or cardboard urn, a box or even an old biscuit tin. We know many people who keep ashes at home and talk to them, maintaining a connection with the person who has died.
Contact me now for a free, no obligation chat.
Ashes scattering and interments start from £50 and increase according to the type of service you require. There is a discount if I officiated the cremation service.